The instant fix to look immediately ravishing is feeling joyful. When you radiate joy, then not only do people notice you, but they want to be around you more often. Do you experience joy on a daily basis? Is this realistic? We here at Mars Venus Coaching think it is—and when you’re able to experience and share joy with others daily, then this also makes you a humbler, more compassionate person as well. No need for a trip to the doctor’s or cosmetologist’s office, the answer lies with you—in your head. You may have heard that a smile opens doors, but what we’re talking about here is pure joy.
Wanting or thinking about being happy or joyful does not necessarily make it so. You have to take a concrete step in order to make joy a part of your reality. It alleviates everything from depression to bad relationships. If you have either—or if you are overweight, dislike your job situation, your relationships aren’t as good as you’d like—then creating a 90 day plan with a coach who keeps you accountable just may help. Try it yourself first, then if you’re having trouble sticking to and articulating what you’re wishing and hoping for—then find yourself a coach that has all the qualities you’re looking to possess yourself.
To get started today below are a few daily scenarios with tips to help you reframe how you perceive your situation and see the joy in your daily life experiences.
On the way to work in a train, plane, or automobile:
Commute slow or lengthy or bogged down…focus on your senses. The smells, how it feels, and what you can hear, and what nature you can see. Look for the beautiful and be in awe. It could be a glimpse of green shrubbery, a whimsical cloud, a soaring bird, or a deer peeking out of the woods. Listening to favorite songs and singing or humming along also works!
Do the unexpected. Settle in to your routine and notice where your body is in relation to what you’re doing. If it feels tight or cramped, do something to alleviate the symptoms—walk outside to get some vitamin D from the sun and notice nature, go to the bathroom and do some stretches, give a compliment to a co-worker or a customer unexpected.
Coming home to a house—empty or full:
Gratitude or Create Beauty. Think of everything you have—shelter, safety, and pick up or look at one of your favorite things. Do something that creates beauty—whether it’s the perfect temperature bubble bath, or the perfect vegetable medley, messy finger paints with your kids, or a crazy haphazard waltz around the house with your loved ones. Engage and immerse yourself in your home and what makes you uniquely you and your family too. Silliness factors in big time!
In a conflict:
Stop. Before you say anything, STOP. Tell yourself STFU or WTF if you need to, but STOP. Before you say anything get into the mindset of the other person. If what you’d like to say will escalate the situation or cause hurt, then don’t. Deflect and deflate the situation by agreeing or redirecting to another topic. Then focus on how you can lift each other up, and how both sides can win.
Listening to the voices in your head:
Run like a kid. And, one of the best remedies is going for a long run in bare feet (or one of those shoes that let’s your arches do what they’re supposed to do and move). What? That’s right—if you can zone out and find yourself in the flow on a run, it doesn’t have to be fast (and it doesn’t have to be without shoes), just start out remembering how you used to do it as a kid. You can also run-walk, but the focus here is to do it like a kid. Remember the thrill of just moving your body and not knowing for how far or how long or how fast you’re trying to do something. The voices will be silenced, and in its place: serene joy.
The more you find yourself throughout the day in the present moment enjoying each sensation and interaction as it happens the more you will be “in” joy. You can do this while parenting, on dates, or all by yourself whenever you need a pick me up. Go ahead, take a picture or dig out an old one of when you were ecstatically happy—I don’t know a picture that isn’t beautiful when joy is present. That’s all it is—is being physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually here right now. Are you there yet? Questions, feel free to ask!